I am the eldest of the three. I was an only child for 8 years before my sister was born, and to another sister a year after. They meant the world to me and I was very much hands-on in taking care of them, especially because my mom was a full-time working mom. I love being with children. I'd organize children's parties and even participated in the church children's ministry. As "equipped" as I was to handle children, being a mom was a whole new dimension. The moment I knew I was pregnant, something stirred in my heart. When she was born, my heart poured out love, strength, resilience and fears I never knew existed. It was the greatest thing that I was proud of, but at that point, it was also hard. The lists includes and is not limited to the following:
Being a person who was afraid to fail, and always looking to plan the next move, I felt that I was losing control. The 'should-have-happen' and 'I-should- know- this' had quickly dissolved into 'go with the flow or else you lose it'. In another words, I had to adapt quickly, let go and move on.
Fortunately, I could communicate with my supportive husband, sharing doubts and fears and he was responsive and helpful to reach out to respective professionals/ friends to learn more. My sisters were my cheerleaders, empathizing and encouraging me to move along. My best friend and neighbors were reaching out, providing me with positive advice and vibes. I was a strong woman, but with these people, they made me a strong mother. And because of that, I could provide a calmer and cheerful environment to my baby. Coupled with the exposure to mommies forums, circle of friends who were becoming/have become mothers and getting acquainted with professionals dealing with moms, one thing stands clear: moms need more support and encouragement. And to obtain that, people have to be aware. Without awareness, one is ignorant and as majority of the surrounding circle of family and friends conform to the expected behaviors and outcomes of a mom, the reality of how real moms are and the truth of families’ ups and downs, diminishes. Moreover, social media has encouraged and condoned a competitiveness amongst women, to prove who has it better, flaunting bodies and lifestyles when really, that rose- tinted glasses is merely the small % of society and quite frankly, that few minutes amongst many hours when moms really got it looking good.
Since when is life represented by only a bed of roses? As a result, some moms withdraw, communicate less and think the less of themselves. What's more, the atmosphere of celebrations and gatherings amongst families and friends are mostly filled with the oohs and ahhs of a baby, gifts and questions of how the baby is doing. Concerns, encouragement and gifts for the mom? Not really. Hence the question: Do we really need an occasion to show a mom kindness, encouragement and love? No! Open up your heart to one and you will see how much it will be received and appreciated! Share with a mom the awareness of self care and they will realize that it's not selfish to love themselves. This is especially for moms, where women ought to come together and not criticize or compete with each other. Slowly but surely, my passion to share the awareness and encourage a mom, fires up. This task is not impossible. Every little step leads the way to create a change. As the minute ticks, as the passions builds, Fierce-Hearted is born.
All 3 of us sisters will be sharing stories from our different perspectives. The good, the bad and the ugly, we're telling it as it is.